A plan

I think I have a plan. I think I will stick to my exsanguination plan in the shower tonight but I will bar the door so that it takes adult strength to open it that way if the kids wake up and look for me (which is doubtful as my husband gets home before they wake up usually) they won't be able to open the door. I really think my husband will get home, check the bedroom, see I'm not there and go looking for me and find me.

I hope I have the guts. I should have done it my first night in last time. It would have been perfect. I had the knife, my family wouldn't have had to find me. I had to over think it and wait until my kids were going to be out of town. That is what messed me up last time.

This time I am going to succeed. I am going to end my family's long term pain with a little short term grief.

God Bless all who read this.